


Feeding (Love Keeps Us Kind)

by chexmixalot



Category: The Strain (TV), The Strain Trilogy - Guillermo del Toro & Chuck Hogan
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Quinlan is good bean, stinger stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-15
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-12-17 00:29:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21045308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chexmixalot/pseuds/chexmixalot
Summary: During your travels with Quinlan and the others to find the nuclear bomb that would defeat the Master, you notice that his hunger has started to make him act different. You decide to offer a solution to it.





	Feeding (Love Keeps Us Kind)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, everyone!  
I am deeply sorry for my absence on the Strain fanfictions. I left one on hiatus and am waiting to return to it one day. I may delete it and rewrite it with a better plot whenever I do get to it. But until then, here is a little short story I had for the reader and Quinlan.  
I hope you guys enjoy it and are well! <3  
(Was inspired by Linkin Park's song, "The Messenger")

It had been months since the nuclear bomb had gone off and destroyed practically all of New York City. Months since the near victory against the Master, who had taken over Palmer’s body. The government had formed an alliance with the strigoi, but there was nothing beneficial about it to the civilians. The human race had become cattle and there was no escaping that.

Eph had been split up from the group and no one knew if he had even survived the blast. The rest of the group were in hiding, away from the strigoi and the Master’s watch. Away from death. Vasiliy, Quinlan, and yourself had set out to find the remaining nuclear bomb to try again at killing the Master. These travels took you out to North Dakota.

Nighttime had fallen once again and there was silence throughout the country. The group you were traveling with had made camp for the night and were trying to ration what foods they had picked up during their scavenging. You noticed that Quinlan had been acting more distant as the week progressed. You knew it was because his hunger as you had yet to see him eat anything for some time.

Sighing, you went to one of the trucks and rummaged through the first aid kit for a syringe and tube, as well as gauze. You were thankful for everyone’s ability to scrounge around for supplies so swiftly while you were in search of the nuclear bomb that would bring about the end of the Master. Abandoned homes with untouched supplies were becoming scarce, but you all managed to find something of use.

Turning on the truck’s light, you carefully tied a piece of cloth around your arm, tight enough to help bring your veins forth. A few moments after, you began to draw your blood, which made your stomach turn. The sight of the tube filling with your blood and the simple feeling of the syringe piercing your skin was something that, on any average day, would make you vomit. But this was no longer an average day. Or night. It was the apocalypse. This version of you that demanded survival was no longer concerned with fainting. You could get over the queasiness. 

You frowned once you bandaged yourself up and observed how small the tube was. It was such a pathetic amount to offer and you could almost hear Quinlan ridicule you. The very thought of taking it to him now made you feel embarrassed. “It’s the thought that counts.” You mumbled, hopping out of the truck and quietly closing its door before heading off to find the Born.

Charlotte noticed the vile in your hand when she walked by and decided that she was going to walk with you instead. You smiled at her decision to invite herself for the walk, but you didn’t mind her. You knew she was never going to be a Dutch Velders, but she made Vasiliy happy. And honestly, she was pretty nice...And hot. 

“Is that for who I think it is?” She asked, low enough just for you to hear.

You shrugged in response. “It’s definitely not enough, but he has to have something.” You heard Charlotte hum, her tone almost tinted with frustration. This caused you to stop and turn to the taller brunette. “Are you judging me?” You accused.

“Not at all.” Charlotte quickly replied. She sounded genuine in this and she followed her words up with an awkward laugh. “I just think we should figure out a way to get him enough so you don’t have to drain yourself.”

You nodded. “I know.” Charlotte placed her gloved hand on your shoulder.

“Maybe I can get Vasiliy to help me convince the others to donate a little more blood next time.” Her hand moved down to the side of your shoulder before patting it, a gesture that she was sending you off to find Quinlan. “Don’t be gone too long.” With that she turned and began to walk back to the camp, leaving you to your errand.

Quinlan wasn’t too far off. He was sitting at the trunk of a massive tree, whose leaves had fallen off long ago. You sat next to him, watching as he studied his sword to make sure it was in good condition. You also sat the tube of blood in front of him. “You’ve been acting a little more grouchier than usual.” You mocked. “So I thought you needed a shot. It’s on me.”

Quinlan looked down at the tube, picking it up and taking notice of its warmth. “This is your blood?” He asked, not exactly sounding too interested.

“Yeah. I figured you’d be happy to have something now instead of waiting for the others to give it up. I know they’re being difficult.” You saw how Quinlan looked questioningly at the size and you felt your face heat up. “Look, I know it’s not a lot. But I tried to get what I could since I haven’t eaten much myself.”

Quinlan nodded and tucked the little vile into his coat. “I won’t torture myself with such a small portion. Thank you, however, for the attempt.”

You frowned again. “Is there any other way to help you until they get the next jar?”

“Not exactly.” Quinlan went back to looking at his weapons, promptly ending the conversation. But you were not content with his answer. You felt your heart hammering in your chest. It was cold out, but you had made up your mind.

You began to undress, throwing your coat on the ground and removing the layers you had on underneath. Quinlan was admittedly surprised and immediately grabbed your coat. He was standing in a matter of seconds. “What is wrong with you? What are you doing?” 

“I’m trying to help you.” You said, ignoring Quinlan’s hand that demanded you take your coat back. You remained in your pants, but refused to put your shirt and sweater back on. Your top half was completely exposed. The cold breeze made itself known in a much more personal way as your nipples hardened and your body was covering itself in goosebumps. 

Quinlan threw the coat around you. “You’re acting foolish. You ask for death doing that.” he began picking up your clothes. “Get dressed now. If you get sick, you’ll only be an inconvenience.” 

“The same goes for you too, Quin. What if the others stop giving you their blood? You won’t be as strong as you need to be. I’m giving you the chance to bite me and put off the hunger.”

“I will not feed off of you, (Y/N).” Quinlan shifted his gaze to the trunk of the tree.

“But I want you to.” 

Something in Quinlan stirred when he heard you say this and he couldn’t bring himself to move. There was a burning in his stomach and he felt a rumbling in his throat as his stinger fought to bring him to his primal sense. In all of this internal conflict, he was met with memories of Louisa. There were times where he swore you and Louisa were one in the same. You were both so involved with your emotions, you knew what you wanted, and you were both so determined. Perhaps that’s what he loved the most about you. About her. 

“Quinlan,” Your quivering voice shook him from his thoughts. “I’m sorry if I’m making you uncomfortable. I’m not trying to force you to do anything you don’t want to.” Quinlan hadn’t realized how his silence was interpreted as rejection. You started to reach for your clothes when Quinlan’s hand grabbed your arm. You jumped and looked up at him.

Quinlan spoke quietly now, looking into your eyes. “Where would you prefer the bite be?”

Your face turned red and you knew he could see it. “I’m not sure.” You tried not to stutter. “As long as the others won’t see it. Vasiliy would throw a fit.” But you both knew that Quinlan didn’t care for Vasiliy’s opinion. If he could, he would mark your entire body. “My chest is fine…” You continued shyly. Of course you didn’t mind if it was elsewhere, but you thought it might seem odd and you didn’t want to seem too into what was about to happen. “I could still function normally that way.”

Quinlan’s desire was building. “Are you certain, (Y/N)?” He watched your lips turn upward into a smile and they quivered from the crisp air. 

“I can handle anything.” You said. You knew that the Born was still unsure of the situation and that he was calculating any possible consequences there might be. You took it upon yourself to move your hand to his, gesturing him to sit at the bottom of the tree with you. You kissed his forehead lightly and rested a hand on his cheek. “You can take your time if you need to.”

But Quinlan knew he couldn’t do that. Not in this frigid weather and not with the others near. He allowed his hands to move gently across your body and he kissed between your shoulder and neck. Your body shivered from the mixture of his touch and the cold, your body warming itself from the arousal you felt. 

Quinlan made sure to maintain control of his stinger, which desperately sought to be released. His kisses trailed down your throat to your chest as his hands explored your breasts, teasing your already sensitive nipples. He wanted to prove his fascination with you. His love for you. That what you allowed him to do was not just feed from you, but to express how much he cared. 

Your heart thumped so loudly, it was deafening in your ears. Quinlan’s attention was always overwhelming. He made you feel secure. He has always kept you grounded when everything around you was falling apart. With him, you knew that you were loved. It also made you wonder if he was this way with the woman he loved long before you. Quinlan never talked about her, but you were certain that she was captivating. She had to be someone he truly loved. Did he love you the same way? Did you hold a candle to everything that Quinlan admired about the other woman?

“Do you wish for me to stop?” Quinlan asked, having noticed the change in your body language. 

You shook your head quickly, snapping yourself out of your concerns and doubts, swallowing your panic. “N-No.” You stuttered out. “I’m just worried about someone seeing us.” This was a lie, but you didn’t want to ruin the moment by asking about the man’s previous love life. It would be ridiculous. 

Quinlan studied your face, knowing you were not being entirely truthful. But he also knew you had a point. Someone might not react too well if they saw what was happening now. “Then I shall make this quick.” He said, kissing your shoulder again.

You smiled and watched as the Born lowered himself to your chest and you blushed deeply when he kissed the mound of your breast. The stinger slowly revealed itself and you felt yourself tense. But you did not flinch. You wanted to help him. To let Quinlan know that your love for him was true. That you loved him for all that he was, even if he could not fully reciprocate those feelings. You needed him to know that you understood. 

Suddenly the stinger attached itself to you, penetrating your skin deeply. You bit down on your bottom lip, drawing some blood as you concealed the cry that nearly broke free. Quinlan didn’t make eye contact with you, fearing that you would find him disgusting. But then he saw everything before his own eyes. Your memories.

He saw your childhood, your teenage years, your journey as an adult. He watched you as you made friends, experienced heartbreak, and the night that you found your parents as strigoi only to be put down by Quinlan’s sword. All of these memories passed in flashes, but he saw it all. He was greeted by memories of everyone you had traveled with. Vasiliy, Dutch, Eph, the Professor… Then he felt warm. Your memories of the times spent with him seemed endless.

How could you not have given up, he wondered. You have been through so much pain and there was more to come. Death was around every corner and even when everything seemed hopeless, you pushed on with the same amount of strength he only learned to have over centuries of living. How could you carry all of the pain and continue on?

Quinlan knew he had become numb as he continued to live on and watched the world change. His life was dedicated to nothing except destroying the Master. The woman and child he loved had died and from that moment on, his existence meant very little except for his goal. But then you came into his life and gave him something more to care about. He felt life spring from him as if he were a plant coming forth from the earth in spring.

He’d always wondered when you would decide you had had enough of the pain and struggles. When you’d decide to take your leave. But you never did. He saw it now, so clearly. You chose him. You selflessly chose to aid him in his mission that would end his life, regardless of victory or defeat. You loved him. Love for a creature who was cold and harsh.

‘Have you no compassion?’ Louisa once asked him.

‘I do not know,’ Quinlan answered, eyes lifeless. ‘I’ve never asked.’

Quinlan’s thoughts were interrupted when he felt your hand weakly caress his cheek. He pulled away immediately, cursing how distracted he had become. He dressed you and picked you up easily. “You need warmth and rest.” He whispered. 

“I’m okay…” You nuzzled into his torso. “Although it is really cold.” You felt weakened from the blood loss, but you also felt content with your decision to do this. “I just hope you feel better.”

Quinlan would not admit it, but he did. But his guilt was more pressing. Everything he did that brought you any form of pain always made him feel so guilty.

“I’m grateful that you exist, Quin.” You continued on, voice laced in drowsiness. But Quinlan did not answer. He carried you back to the camp where everyone had fallen asleep. Except for Charlotte. She had waited up.

She stood in concern and went to the both of you. “What happened?”

“She’s fine.” Quinlan replied, still holding you close. “She just needs rest.” 

Charlotte looked at Quinlan with questioning eyes. She could already guess what had happened, but she wouldn’t ask questions. She also wasn’t one to tell anyone’s secrets. Vasiliy didn’t need to know. “I’ll get some bandages and see if I can find some extra blankets in one of the trucks.” She said, turning away. “Quinlan,” She added, looking over her shoulder. “Don’t get her killed by letting her be so reckless.”

Quinlan was silent, but he held you tight as he sat by the fire. This was your choice. Reckless as usual, but good in heart. If you had to do it again, he knew you would not hesitate. You never would. You could handle anything.


End file.
